Being 2 ain't easy

Being 2 years old is no laughing matter. It's a job that should be taken very, very seriously. If you're considering applying for the position of a 2 year old, please know that certain prerequisites must be met; the first of these prerequisites is knowledge in the art of over-accessorizing. The next is a keen taste for baked goods...but not so much the baked part of baked goods. We're talking icing people. In order to be considered for the position of a 2 year old, you must be able to lick all the icing off of a cupcake while somehow managing to not actually bite the cupcake - not bite it at all. Then, conveniently, give it back to your mother who will have no idea what she's supposed to do with it. (But Lord help her if she throws it out.)A clean driving record is a must. As is collecting things that are really not of much use to you but that you know are of very much use to others. Then you should refuse to give those things back to the people that would find them quite, quite useful. And if you can do this while wearing as much pink as possible you may actually be over qualified for the position. But, most importantly, you have to be absolutely adorable. (And willing to battle fire-breathing tiki torches armed with only a wiffle ball bat.)